You never forget your first. (the goodbye post)

Last night, as the Victoria Salmon Kings ended the Utah Grizzlies play off run in double over time, the chat room where a few of the youareahockeyfan blog readers were enjoying the game together went completely silent.  It wasn't just the loss after such an exciting and hopeful and hardworking game that despite the end result will always be memorable, it was the realization that the 2010-11 season was finished.  There was no work for the boys to check into the following day, no upcoming game, no required public appearance (that we're aware of yet.)

In a sense? The hot and steamy love affair that we've had with the best team the bosses have assembled in the last fifteen years was over and it was time to say goodbye.

What follows is my personal farewell to each of the guys, but I'd like to encourage each of my readers to leave their own farewell in the comments below too if they'd like.  I have my suspicions (and a few whispered confessions) that the boys regularly drop by the blog, so here's your chance.

Firstly, I have to acknowledge the Grizzlies management, all of them, for giving me the opportunity to be a part of the best team in the ECHL this year.  Several months ago I approached all of you with a plan to bring the team to the fans through a blog that wouldn't be weighed down by criticism or the dryness of statistics.  It would be an introduction to the personalities and the stories as experienced by someone new to the sport, new to the team, an unlikely figure to be adopted but nevertheless was.  I know that in some ways it was mission accomplished, but it never would have happened if not for your willingness to take the same leap.  It has meant the world to me, I am told it has made a difference to others, and I hope that next season we can make this even better together.  Thank you so much.

And now...onto the players....without whom this blog truly...truly...would be nothing...

(Simon, I'm saving you for last so you'll just have to wait. *insert evil laughter here*)

Which means Marcus Carroll is first of the players.

Dear Marcus, you were one of the first that I met, the first who actually gave me and Goliath the time of day, the first to doodle upon the infamous doodle jersey, and you were the first to recognize my camera while on the ice and to look me in the eye.  Long before Simon or any of the others realized where the camera that plastered them on the internet was, you were already posing for it like a pro.   If you don't know already, you should know how highly I think of your talent and how much I respect how good you are to the fans.  I'm there for warm-ups and I see you "missing" shots intentionally just so the puck flies up into the net and into the waiting hands of children below.   You make a lot of hearts melt every time and a lot of young fans very happy and you get nominated for the magnanimous bear award almost weekly for it.  I wish I had invented the awards earlier so you could have had your week, but even so...know that you are appreciated by many of the fans.  If you leave us, I shall miss you terribly...our agitator with the heart of gold.

Hiya Matt Reber!!!

Even though you are a late addition, you deserve a farewell too because you've made such a huge impression.  I can't say I've ever seen an ATO contribute more to a team than you have the last few weeks.  You gave it your all and you made a whole slew of fans in the process.  I respect your talent, your hard work, and your competitive spirit. You were a good sport to pose for a last minute portrait and doodle the "worst puck ever" on the jersey...even though it was, far and away, the BEST puck drawn on this jersey.   Here's hoping we see you again next year.  Should that be the case, I just may have to become an even bigger fan.

Hiya Tom May!

You are one of the few I can't say I know well, and it has always been a shame to me because you are an incredibly talented individual on the ice.  It has been such a joy to watch your awe-inspiring scoring streaks through the early months of this year.  You are so consistently good and I love how you make the stands shudder and rumble with cheers.  Tom May is on the ice and already we know something good is about to happen. You never disappoint.  And that makes you memorable and should you leave us...very very missed. Best of luck to you wherever you go.

Hiya Shea!

Shea, your smile can change the world.  I'm not kidding (....even though I decided to post a portrait of you chewing gum...I mean it.)  Thank you so much for always smiling and thank you for being one of only two players who spontaneously and sincerely hugged me when given their portrait (Tyler Sims was the other).  I was so surprised and it meant a great deal.  You seem so warm and good whether to hobble out of the doors in a towel to wave hello to your girlfriend or stopping on your way out the building to ask "how are you" with genuine interest in the answer.  A lot of fans were thrilled at your return and it has been my happy duty to learn why.  Best of luck to you, you genuinely sweet guy you, wherever you go...though of course, we all hope to see you wearing the green and copper again.

Hey Kevin!

Deether, you are something special. You really are.  There's a reason Goliath and I have spoiled you these last few months...you were one of the first we remembered and were totally awed by.  In those early days we would stand and cheer you on, "Go DEEEEAATTHHH!" because anytime you were on the ice it meant death for the other team's chance at scoring.  We have cheered you on as "Kev" and cheered you on as "Deeth" and "Deether" and "Death" and even the "Lionheart" for your amazing courage on the ice.  You are adored, respected, and admired.  What more can I say that I've not already said almost every week for months now?  I believe whole-heartedly in you, I always have, and I know that a guy as great as you probably won't be coming back, you'll go higher, you belong higher, and I won't get to cheer you on in the maverick center anymore if that's the case...but I'll still cheer for you wherever you go. 

Hiya Chris!

Chris Donovan.  The flirt. The rookie. The cheeky mischievous man with the Cheshire smile and the eyes that tease and taunt and scold and smoulder.  You are a wonderful colorful character...one day I shall write you into a story and only you and I and a very privileged few shall recognize your personal brand of merry talent.  I think I will give you a ridiculous name, but one that only this character with his wit and charm can pull off effortlessly.   Perhaps....oh...I'll leave you hanging.  After all, a character like you needs a devious writer like me to dangle you all along, right?  Don't worry, I'll make him a total badass.

Hiya Brent!

I do believe Goliath has had many more conversations with you than I have because of your mutual love of rugby and New Zealand, but nevertheless you should know that you are appreciated by me as well. I am grateful to you as a player-coach for helping this team get as far as it's gotten despite so many challenges this year.  Thank you so much!

Hiya Brett!

Wow, Brett.  I will miss you.  A few weeks ago I saw you smile like I've never seen you smile before.  I was explaining to JP the need to sign the doodle jersey.  As he argued his inability to draw, I nodded nonchalantly in your direction and said, "Brett did it" and there it was...you suddenly cracked a smile and said, "Yes I did," and then proceeded to recall precisely what you had drawn and where you had drawn it.  You're so quiet, so focused most of the time we see you that that spontaneous smile and recollection of yours took me by surprise and etched itself into memory.  And you are so damn talented.  And...last but not least, boy it is ever a treat for me as a photographer to get to see what lots of people don't....you swear an awful lot.   Such a sweet mild looking guy but if something goes wrong *&)T*^R)&^)&.  I repeat. I will miss you terribly.

Hiya Hugo!!!

Hey there, Hugo.  I'll always find it funny that I only started getting to know you after Max left, but I am so glad I have.  You've always waved us goodnight since, tolerated my weak french and Goliath's weaker french,  frequently stopped for a friendly chat, and been consistently humble and kind.  You were willing to say hello to our blog readers in french and I am very grateful for the time you've shared with us and your enthusiasm.  It's always exciting when you're on the ice and I truly truly truly hope we see you again.  Thank you, Hugo, for everything these last few weeks and best of luck to you wherever you go from here.

Hiya Riley!!!

Riley you already know how much Goliath and I admire and respect you.   You've been consistently good to us, and consistently good to many of the fans.  Thank you so much, you and Jen too, for always being willing to stop and help us out at the end of the night....whether to share a joke with readers of this blog, to sign a few posters for fans, answer questions or simply to have a chat.  My nephews look up to you a great deal and they're always pestering me for the latest tale of their champion.  You, like Kevin and Simon, were one of the very first players we learned to recognize and came to love, it has been a real privilege to watch the "most feared pair of fists" in the ECHL play for the Utah Grizzlies.  Thank you, Riley, for protecting this team and for being kind and tolerant of these two crazy bloggers.  Give our love to Jen, as well. 

Hiya Paul!!

Paul, I sure as heck will miss you, your sexy hair, and your mad mad talent.  You've only been with us the last month or so, but boy has it been a ride.  You are just so consistently good and I've never seen you put up with any crap.  We all over here at the blog can't help but admire you and wish you the very very best in the future.  I really hope you stay with us, but I wouldn't be surprised to see you snatched up elsewhere after the incredible performance you've put on here.   Take care and thanks so much for giving the Grizz your all these past few weeks.

Hey Brendan

Thank you so much for being the guy who kept me from giving up.  The first day I met you I was having an awful week, an awful year to be honest, and felt largely intimidated by what it was I was hoping to accomplish with this blog.  I didn't know you guys.  I didn't have experience in journalism or experience in the hockey industry and had just been hurt by the words, "Why would professional hockey players talk to you?"  By the time I approached you to interview you for the blog I was shaking in my shoes.  And then you smiled, laughed, and went along with the whole thing.  Five days later you still remembered who I was and you've been consistently kind to me ever since.   I will always be your fan and friend for it, no matter where you go. Thank you. 

Mr. Matt Clarke

You have a lot of fans and I don't think you realize this.  I realize this because I've met a lot of them and hear from a lot of them almost every week.    Matt, you're loved, you're talented, you're gorgeous, and we all wish to see you in the green and copper again but, if not, best of luck to you as always wherever you go.

Dear Matt Sorteberg

I have grown so very fond of you these last few months, it's true.   You have been kind and tolerant of me on days when I probably didn't deserve your patience.  You put up with tight hugs when you were bruised and aching and uninterested in having the stuffing squeezed out of your middle.   You tolerated my mothering when you lost your teeth and got a concussion.  You drew two adorable fish-things on the doodle jersey. Some nights you've stood there in the hall looking at me as though you half expected me to hug you whether you wanted it or not because you'd become so accustomed to me glomping you on your way out the door without permission.  You're a handsome sweet guy and a great hockey player as well...you made yourself a favourite of mine without even meaning to, I think.  I will probably be heartbroken if you leave us as a result, but I'll remain a permanent fan.  Take care and best of luck to you always.

Shulzy!!!

Hey David, I just wanted to say that I haven't forgotten about your request for pictures for your family.  If you do happen to read this...just email me...and over the summer as I go through the gazillion photos I have, I will send a few your way.   Other than that, thanks, for being such an incredible defenseman, for humouring me, for telling bad jokes and being one of those guys I'm always glad to see on the ice. 

Mr. Brock Wilson

The first time I met you I 1. recognized you immediately and 2. couldn't stop myself from wrapping my arms around your midsection which you didn't just tolerate at the time, but welcomed.  You've always been a fan favourite and it's always been easy to see why.  I can't thank you enough for putting up with me the last few months.  You're almost as good as Goliath at it.  From tolerating photos, chats, videos, and endless letters from fans you've proven again and again why you're more than just a hockey player.  You're an absolute ambassador for the sport and I respect you tremendously for it.  I have you to thank for giving me my first lesson in approaching professional athletes.  I know I've screwed up a million times with you and the entire team, but you've always set me straight, firmly but not unkindly, helping me to navigate this job.  You've been a mentor, you ARE a mentor. Not just to me, but to lots of people. So thank you.  And Brock,...do I even need to say it?  I will be very heartbroken if you are contracted elsewhere, you've become such a staple to this community, but no matter what...take care.

Hey Brian,

Thanks so much for always smiling, for always laughing and being cheerful around me. You are a ray of sunshine even when bruised.  Every time I see you it's always "don't worry about me, sweetheart, I'm just fine!"  Your optimism and cheer inspires me and if you leave us I will miss that the most about you.

Hey Giff,

Giffen, I can't help but feel you're one of those nice guys who gets a lot of crap and I can't figure out why.  I adore you.   In fact, I've decided you're a bit of a diamond in the rough, an overlooked sweetheart.   When you score a goal, you leap and dance and cheer in a way that makes all of our hearts leap with you.  You could be great someday and I hope you don't let all the BS life throws at you deter you from continuing to pursue excellence in yourself and in your game.  Take care, Giff.

Hiya Nick!

 

Thank you Nick for being one of the coolest guys I was privileged to meet in the beginning.  My nephews admire you, Goliath respects you, and you drew me a beautiful flower on the doodle jersey. You are a spectacular player, so much so I'm sure we probably won't be seeing you next year, and I will be very sad to lose you.  

JP

Haven't met you enough to really say goodbye to you, but I and everyone else will surely miss you. You are a tremendously talented goalie and despite not knowing me the few times we've run into one another you've been helpful and kind in every instance.  You are professional and brilliant and I know we likely won't be seeing you at the ECHL level again, which is as it should be.  Best of luck to you and thank you for helping to give us a phenomenal run.

Hey Engy

When you left us for the AHL, Goliath was truly upset.  Of all the players you were the one he wanted to meet the most and when you left he muttered about it every now and then. I grumbled right along with him because I too had never had the opportunity to meet you before then.   I am so grateful we got that opportunity later.  Thank you so much, Andrew, for being our most valuable player, for being the goalie we remember best and have loved.  There is greatness in you, always believed that, and we wish you the best, the absolute best, in all you pursue.  I hope we see you again, but in case we don't, thank you again and here's a hug and a handshake from myself and Goliath.

As for all of the other players we have seen come and go...the Crowders, Snetsinger, Ruesegger, my beloved Maxime Tanguay who if I bid farewell to will reduce me to a puddle of tears again, Samson Mahbod, Ryley Grantham, Tyler Sims, Marc Rinfret, Shane Connelly, etc.  Thank you for your contributions this year and thank you for everything when it came to this blog.  I won't forget any of you, especially those I came to know and love.

And last but not least.

Hi Simon,

You are the one I will miss the most and you are the one I have loved best.  And though it is possible I am wrong, there's a small part of me that suspects you're going to miss me too.   You're going to miss my near-constant declarations of your sexy awesomeness-incredible talent-occasional but trademark obnoxiousness, and my cheers of "YAY! I can finally go home!" when you emerge from the locker room...since, the closer it got to the end of the season the more important it became for me to say goodbye every night before I'd have to, well, really say goodbye. And I guess now it's time.   Simon, I think I'll always regret never getting to hug you and telling you in person all of the things I've said here in the blog.  It's just every time I see you, I feel like you already know. You know how I picked you from day one, declared you the best and have stood by you even when some of your actions have challenged me.  You know I'll be your fan and friend whether you end up in Europe or end up in AHL or end up wherever.  And I'll miss you terribly.  And if by some amazing chance I see you on the ice in the maverick center wearing another C on your chest next season...you had best watch out...because I'm not missing my next chance to wrap my arms around you and tell you thank you.    You've meant the world to me this year.  And know what? You're the first hockey player to give me a kiss, granted it was on the hand, but...you never forget your first right?  Simon, you're the best.  I said a lot of it when I wished you happy birthday a few weeks ago on the blog.  You changed my life.  Thank you.

One of the interesting things about great people is that they change things, they change people's lives without even realizing it.  You guys will never understand how you have and you may be completely bewildered to discover you have...but you have.  Great people do that.  I am so lucky, so so lucky to have gotten to know each of you.  I wish with all of the sincere love I have for you guys the very best wherever you go. I'm selfish, I want you here in Utah, but I also want you all to be happy and successful...so I'll say goodbye, but I'll never forget any of you.  Take good care of yourselves and keep changing lives...one kind smile, one amazing play at a time.

Alright, readers, I'm a big sobbing mess...it's your turn.

And oh yeah, Simon, one other thing.  EMAIL ME DAMMIT.  Should you proceed to drop off of the face of the earth I will not forgive you.  *points* *glares*  Email me updates please.  And the rest of you can do so too.

Goodbye.